Anonymous asked:

So I’ve been in love with this guy for around a year now. We dated once but it didn’t last longer than 3 months. I still have lots of strong feelings for him but I’ve began to notice that I have feelings of love towards my best guy friend and I don’t know what to do or who to choose? I think the second likes me back but you can never be sure with him.

Violet responded:

I would say don’t date either of them until you sort out your feelings towards your ex.  Find out the reasons why you guys broke up, and try to find out if it’s really worth getting back together with him.  If he doesn’t share the same desire, then give yourself some time to get over him.  Don’t jump into another relationship with your best friend right away, give yourself some time to heal.  If your best guy friend is really your best friend, then he’ll understand that you need time for yourself.

If you decide to go for your best friend right away instead of pursuing your ex, then it’s not fair to your best friend because you still have feelings towards your ex.  Without dealing with them, you could hurt your friend more than by not being with him at all.

Just take time to sort out your feelings.  Don’t jump into a relationship too early, and make sure to talk things out with your friend to see where he stands as well.


Have your own question for Violet?  Head on over to and ask your own question!